I cannot play guitar although I tried so very hard to,
Like Eric Clapton, David Gilmour or The Edge from U2
Heard Slash from Guns ‘N Roses and I yearned to make an axe sing
Like him, but found his power chords and riffs were much too taxing.
Two decades after Bryan Adams got his first real six-string
I’d played it till my fingers bled but soon discovered mixing
Rock-and-roll with working wasn’t good for my career, so
I cast away my youthful dream to be a guitar hero.
And now I’m nearly forty-three, aware I’ll never master
The magic and the mystery of the Fender Stratocaster.
Keith Richards, Satriani and the rest need never fear me:
I’ll stick to what I know (three chords). Be grateful you can’t hear me.